Girlfriends...and a special boyfriend!

Last night I had the opportunity to spend time with my close girlfriends. These are the kind of friends everyone needs in their lives. The ones that can make you laugh about almost anything...including failed relationships, sexual experiences and even fighting cancer. They are the people who know you best in life...your likes, dislikes (not just the ones you post on Facebook) and take time to listen to your emotional outbursts, whatever the subject may be. They are the people you can cry with, who will hold your hand, rub your back and tell you things are going to get better. The kind of friends you can talk about sex toys, onion dip and menstrual cramps all in the same hour. They are your true soul mates who could never be replaced in your life...and no matter how far the distance between you physically, they are always near and dear to your heart. Although we may not see or talk to each other as often as we'd like, they never seem to age and change like so many things around us. I have been blessed in my life to have many dear girlfriends....and a very special boyfriend (whom I now call my brother). Most are from my schoolgirl days...a few from work experiences and through mutual acquaintances. However they have come into my life, I am grateful they are here. When life brings about wonderful, happy moments they are the ones I share with...the graduations, first date experiences, bridal and baby showers, weddings. And when the ugly, lowest times in my life occur, broken relationships, job losses, illness and deaths, they are the ones I depend on most for love, support and words of encouragement. Our discussions at last night's gathering were quite diverse: work, family, sex, food, religion and faith (and lack of), stress and love. Sometimes staying in on a Saturday night is much more fun than hitting a bar or club or whatever. It was time for bonding, drinking, eating and sharing our souls...feeding our souls. It made me realize how much our inner child desires to belong to a group, how much we want a family we've created out of people we actually want to be around and spend time with. And although our lives take us in different directions, either because of family, work and just life itself, we always manage to end up together when the need is there. Sometimes "girls' night out/in" is exactly what we need to find ourselves, remember who we are and why we do what we do. If you can measure a person's wealth by the friends they have and the people they love, then by far I am a rich girl! But I'm still planning on buying a lotto ticket or two this week...$356 million couldn't hurt, right?

They happen in 3's

Last week my mom and I had 3 funerals to attend in one week. These funerals were very different from one another...parts were in Spanish or Chinese, honoring the different cultures. One included symbolic mementos from a Yaqui Indian heritage, another had the USC fight song played as part of the tribute. It was beautiful to see the different ways my friends paid tribute to their dads/grandpa. It was moving to hear the relatives speak with love, respect and honor about the wonderful man in their life they had lost. It was tear jerking to see the reaction of the guests when they saw the many photos of loved ones in happier times. But the funerals were also a dose of reality, reminding me that any of us could go at anytime and we must cherish each and every day we are given. And I am reminded what a big part "death" is in our lives. It's something we all face and must deal with at some point in our lives. And it's something we should all think about and discuss with our friends and loved ones. No one should die without some kind of plan. I'm not talking about a pre-paid entire funeral plan with burial plot chosen...I'm talking about what would you want your final resting place to be? How do you want people to pay tribute to you? How do you want to be remembered? I already know where I am going to be...Rose Hills, with the rest of my family. I want something simple...no need for a big service....some pretty flowers : springy, colorful and cheery. Some cool music : just pop on my ipod, it would be the best bet. The most important part would be friends...lots and lots of friends. And not to sit or stand around crying...but smiling, laughing and sharing stories with one another. I don't want people talking about a life full of regrets. I try my best to do the things I want to do that make me happy, and would want that reflected at my funeral.