Birds of a feather

Sitting in the infusion department at chemotherapy today for Mark's round 3 treatment, I noticed the various members of the medical team and various species of birds came to mind. There is the front desk receptionist...she is a blue jay. She smiles and is often caught singing to herself as she busily processes patient forms and payments. She always seems happy and chipper. There are the therapy nurses...the core and strength of the team. Floating from patient to patient like busy hummingbirds in different colored Crocs and Sketcher Shape Ups, they perform a multitude of tasks in the few hours they see their patients. There are also the stool pigeons of the nurses....those that stand around pretending to do work like the others, but are only there to collect their paycheck. They peck around from here to there, trying to look busy when the administrators are around. The phlebotomists are like vultures, seeking their next victim for blood....and never apologizing when they can't seem to find a vein. The doctors are the peacocks...flaunting their white coat feathers as if trying to attract a mate. They seem to silently scream, "Look at me! I'm important! I'm better than you!" This was especially evident when a patient in the next space threw up from his chemo treatment and all one of the doctors did was call over any orderly to clean it up...(Please note, our doctor.."Dr. B" as we call him, is in no way one of these peacocks. He does not wear a coat. From day one, when we asked him why he didn't have a coat, he informed us, "I don't care for the attitude and separation it seems to bring about when it's worn." Ask any of his nurses or patients, Dr. B is the best! We feel fortunate to have him!). The orderly is the sparrow...barely noticed by others, but diligently working to keep the department going. The most impressive member of the staff I observed is the Nurse Case Manager...Mother Hen to the department. She knows everything about everyone including what meds they are taking, what side effects to expect, which nurse is celebrating a birthday and what time so and so went to lunch...it was amazing to watch her in action! The roost would break down without a case manager. All in all, it was a fun day people watching.
PS-Mark's treatment went without incident today. He visited the cardiologist yesterday who said things looked alright. Follow up will be in a couple weeks. I'll keep you posted! :)

Round Two

Mark started round two of chemo this week. After a get away weekend to Vegas, where we saw Weird Al in concert...yeah, Weird Al...it was nice to come home to cooler weather and an affectionate cat who obviously missed us both. We went to the oncologist office on Wednesday and began the IV/port hook up. Things were a little smoother this time, since we knew what to expect and got a head start on nausea prevention...breakfast and anti-nausea pills as a chaser. And the treatment went a little quicker than last time. We were done at 3 p.m. The weird side effects that have occurred are Mark's jaw gets clenched and he is complaining of tiny sore in his mouth and throat...he describes them as little ice crystal like formations that react when he drinks something chilled. We may have to switch to room temperature drinks for a while. At least it's not the peak of summer and the weather is cooling down a little. Sleeplessness is still an ongoing issue for him, but he wants to take as little additional meds as possible. He's taking: anti-nausea preventive, anti-nausea as needed, anti-diarrhea as needed, Norco for pain during the day, Percaced for pain at night, a heart med for the palpitations (preventive), anti-inflammatory for the tumor swelling and I'm sure I'm forgetting others. When the paramedics came 2 weeks ago for the heart palpitations, one of them asked, "Is he on any medications?" I laughed as I handed him a grocery bag full of bottles. I must say that things are going rather smoothly and we are remaining positive and have found time to laugh about stuff and enjoy life. Vegas was fun and we plan to take some more trips when treatments are over. Maybe North Carolina or Connecticut? We'll see how things go.

Please, thank you....

Two simple phrases, "Please" and "Thank you"...they can make all the difference in the world on how you are perceived by others and the impact you make on someone else's day. I have experienced, over the last 5+ years, the difference between someone who always says please and thank you, vs. someone who hardly uses the two phrases (at least when dealing with me, go figure). When I moved in with my grandparents in 2006, it was to help them out around the house and to help take care of my aunt who was suffering senile dementia...not an easy task. My auntie was sweet, appreciative and had an loving innocence that the harshest conditions in life never stole away from her. And my grandfather was the same... stubborn (I now know where I got it from), but always showed his appreciation. "Jenn, when you have a chance, could you please take me to get my hair cut? Thank you." "Could you please look up the Dodger's schedule for me? Thanks." I would be thanked before the act was even done. And always thanked after it was done. Buy my grandmother is different in every way imaginable. Rather than ask, she tells...."I'm out of milk, you know." "I can't open this jar, the lid is too tight." "If you're too tired to cook, then go and get something." It's a harsh environment to try to be a loving caretaker. I have had to restrain myself many times from speaking my mind and other actions that would be frowned upon by many. So I feel the need to remind everyone to show your appreciation. Let someone know they are important to you and have value. When you ask your co-worker for a favor, say PLEASE, even if it's just to hold the elevator door. And when your spouse prepares dinner, tell them THANK YOU, whether it was a 4 course extravaganza or "just" take out. It will put a smile an their face and remind them what a good person YOU are. I always make it a habit of trying to make people smile. If I have a cranky check out person at the store, I will comment on how I like their nail polish or jewelry. I always tell the parking attendant at the hospital, "Thank you. Have a nice day." So go and make someone feel appreciated and valued with PLEASE and THANK YOU, that's all it takes. You are guaranteed a smile and probably a similar greeting in return. And that will make YOUR day!

What cancer has taught me.

The experience of care taking for someone battling cancer has taught me many things. I have become enlightened to what a good, no...a GREAT nurse is capable of doing for their patients. The honesty and true expression of compassion my husband and I received today was amazing. I've learned cancer doesn't only make an impact on the patient, it impacts all the lives around the patient. I've learned that being busy isn't when you have 2 birthday parties to shop for and cupcakes to make for those parties...Being busy is having back to back doctor appointments, multiple visits in a week to the lab/pharmacy for tests, x-rays, ct scans, and prescriptions for new pills to counteract the side effects the old pills are causing. Being tired isn't running a marathon or working 2 hours over time...Being tired is not sleeping night after night because you're in pain, you're worried about whether or not treatments will work this time or you're sick to your stomach because of the poison you have running through your veins. Frustration isn't what you feel because your kid's grades aren't as high as you want or you didn't get that raise you've been waiting for...Frustration is not being able to do the things you love in life because you feel exhausted and weak from not having an appetite or any energy. It's the feeling of your body failing to do what you want it to do because it is sick. Patience isn't waiting for your Cafe' Grande to be prepared by the new barista...Patience is not losing your temper when your loved one turns down everything you offer for them for comfort, because you know in your heart that maybe nothing you EVER offer can give them the comfort they need or seek. (but you keep trying anyway). Devotion isn't expressed by flowers on your anniversary or going to church on a Sunday...Devotion is sitting with someone while they are in pain and even though you know you can't do anything to help them, you're still there to hold their hand and let them know they're not alone. And cancer has taught me that sometimes you have to hit the lowest point in your life to find out how wonderful your loved ones and true friends are and can be. They are the ones who surprise you with a night out, make you laugh harder than you've laughed in months, call just to ask how you are, and light candles or send prayers for you in hopes that soon everything will be fine.