42..

So...I'm 42. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel about turning a year older...climbing higher into the 40s. But, I am fine with it. I must admit, I do not feel 42. I'm told I do not look 42 either. I was spoiled with many celebrations with many friends and loved ones, starting with an intimate dinner with my second family (with surprise cake and balloons), a gorgeous day out at the Getty Museum (including a picnic lunch), a fabulous dinner out to Roy's in Downtown L.A., a casual gathering at my dear friends' house (with roses and another surprise cake...this time ice cream cake), brunch with my gal pals, belated celebration lunch with mom, and I got to see my best friend several times during a brief visit from San Francisco. Not to mention multiple phone calls, cards, Facebook messages and well wishes from all over. I feel blessed and so loved to have so much to be thankful for in my life. It has been a most challenging year for me in many ways, but it has also been a year filled with new beginnings, self discovery, growth and change for the better. I do not remember the last time I felt so little stress in my life. I find myself smiling and laughing every day, which has taken a long time to get to. I appreciate each moment I spend with a friend or loved one. I find joy in the little things in life...like a sweet smelling rose, a perfectly ripened strawberry, a silly moment with the canine kids, or a gentle kiss from that someone I care so much about. Life has given me more than my share of lessons, heartaches and losses. I feel like I've experienced more in 10 years than most people do in their entire lifetime. But each event has made me stronger, more understanding, more loving and especially more appreciative of every thing and person I have in my life. I have been blessed with wonderful friends, old and new. I inherited my mom's zest for life, generosity, creativity and compassion. I inherited my dad's sense of humor, common sense, technical skills (some), and passion for cooking and helping others. My grandparents blessed me with financial intelligence, a house to call my home, gardening skills and proof that love can endure the test of time. My wonderful friends have given me the irreplaceable gift of love and support through thick and thin, not letting distances or life events make a dent in the bond we have with one another. They all give me something unique as individuals, but together...they make my life complete. And love has come back into my life, in more ways than I could ever imagine. I have been fortunate to make connections with different individuals who have made me learn to appreciate and love myself, see beauty when I look in the mirror, and allow myself to feel worthy of happiness and love again. And although I did not meet them the traditional way of meeting people, I feel blessed to have made some very special friends. And I'll admit, some of these connections were brief friendships, but I have learned to believe people come into our lives for some purpose, whether it is for a day, a week or a lifetime. Each person I've met has made some impact on my life...maybe not in an grand, significant way, but there are always lessons to be learned. I think back to the days of childhood...when you made special wishes for the things you want for your birthday...a new doll, a bike, a video game or roller skates. And now, I think of the new list of things I want...good health, friends and family, love and passion, and an appreciation for life and the freedom/time to enjoy it. I am blessed to have all these things.